Your besties are your soul mate in everything from a shoulder to cry on to a partner in crime when it’s time for that sort of thing. They are that extra breath of life kicked into our lungs when we need it most. They’re the people who weave their way into our hearts in the deepest way, tucking themselves neatly next to the space we keep for our parents, our sisters and our brothers. In short, they are the family that you handpicked yourself and who vows to stick around you though all thick and thin. As Oprah Winfrey once said, “Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.”
They’re the nest you’ve made for yourself – and sometimes, it takes a person who knows you and still loves you to teach you the tough stuff
#1 They Teach You How To Forgive (And Forget)
Your best friends will teach you how to move onwards and upwards in life. They’ll stop you from dwelling on what already happened and show you how to focus on what’s already happening. They’ll give you life when you’re drowning.
They’ll teach you how to forgive the guy who broke your heart (it wouldn’t have worked out anyway), how to forget him (he didn’t deserve you).
They’ll teach you how to move past that failed math test (no one’s ever going to ask you how to do a proof), how to forget that horrible English essay (people don’t even care about Faulkner these days) and how to smile with your head held high through it all.
They’ll teach you that you’re better than anything that douche had to say and how to forgive him for his little brain (and little, well, you know).
#2 They Teach You That You’re Never Alone
Sometimes the world will blow out the candle it’s holding tightly against the dark and dreary road you’re walking.
You’ll feel abandoned and alone, unsure of yourself… and terrified. In those moments, you’ll feel the weight of your best friends beside you, keeping you comfortable, keeping your path well-lit.
They’ll be there beside you in your hardest moments, even when you tell them you don’t want them. They’ll come. From now until forever, there’s never a moment or a memory they’ll miss.
Like a portable security blanket you’ll always have someone to go everywhere with and someone to stand next to you as you take on life’s biggest hurdles.
#3 They Teach You Your Family Is Who You Choose
Maybe you love your given family more than anything. Maybe you don’t. That’s your prerogative. The beauty about building your own nest is that your nonnuclear family is made up of the people that you choose.
They’re the people that you call when you’re in a jam, the people that help you bury the proverbial body. They’re Your Person. They’re Your People.
Your girls are the ones who would bring swords to a bitch fight, the ones who would bring hell and high water to the table in your defense.
If Carrie Bradshaw was right about anything, it was family. Sometimes in the family you’re born into and sometimes it’s the one you build for yourself.
#4 They Teach You How To Always Be Better Than You Are
There is no one that will raise you up higher than your girlfriends. They’re the people that see you clearly, always, for the the person you are – and they’re the ones that want you to be better, that know you can be better.
Maybe you drank too much and made a fool out of yourself, maybe you insulted a coworker, maybe you insulted your boyfriend’s best friend – or maybe you gained 15 pounds during the long and grueling winter.
You can lie to yourself up and down about the ways you’re going to be better – but if you want an honest kick in the pants, look to your friends.
They’ll shine the light back at you, brighter and more clearly that you’re able to do for yourself. They’ll challenge and test you to be the best version of yourself. Why? Because they’ve seen you at your highest.
They know what you’re capable of. So even if you can’t see it yourself, they can. And they’ll push you to be that person.
#5 They Teach You Just How Brave You Are
I didn’t know what I was capable of until I had best friends. I was motivated, opinionated and strong. I had strong parents, who challenged and inspired me, but yet, nothing compares to what a friend can give you.
I learned that I could cry – and that it didn’t make me any less brave, that I could fall apart and still be proud.
#6 They Teach You That There’s Nothing Better Than A Good Cry (And A Bottle Of Wine)
You’ll spend so many hours of your life choking back tears – from your boss, from your colleagues, from that guy at the pizza place. But your best friends will teach you it’s okay to collapse into their arms and give way to your tears.
They’ll be by your side in an instant with a bottle of wine and your chocolate of choice. They’ll smile through each and every Ugly Cry and reassure you that everything will be okay, even if they’re not sure it will be.
They’ll hold you while you heave in sorrow and lull you to sleep – and then never tell a soul.
#7 They Teach You How To Laugh So Hard You Pee Yourself
Because a best friend knows that you find it hilarious when she does the whaling impression or that videos of people falling are the best thing ever. They push you to the verge of peeing and then hilariously send you over the edge.
#8 They Teach You That Some Secrets Are Better When Shared
Women are an endless pit of secrets. We lie about our age to strangers, lie to the guy who broke our heart for the very first time, lie to our parents, lie to ourselves. But it’s best friends who force us to spill those secrets. They’re willing to share the burden.
They don’t care that you slept with a married man, they don’t care that you slept with a guy you barely know.
They don’t care that you took a dollar from the wishing well or that you hate your cousin’s fiance, they just don’t want you to carry the weight alone.
#9 They Teach You How to Fight
I’m sorry, but I consider fighting with your boyfriend tame compared to some of the showdowns I’ve seen between best friends.
Your girls will challenge and debate you on everything from marriage equality and wedding colors to who-kissed-whom at the bar and the most flattering shades of lipstick.
They fight with you because they love you – and because they want somethingmore from you. Your girls will teach you how to fight – and how to fight fair.
Maybe you disagree a lot, maybe you disagree only every so often and maybe you have that one blow-up fight that lasts a cool six months.
There’s no one, no one on this planet who can bring you center stage in the lion’s den and then pick you back up and walk you out.
#10 They Teach You How to Apologize – and Really Mean It
You won’t learn how to apologize from those forced makeups your mom requires. You won’t learn how to apologize after pocketing that lip gloss and getting caught.
But after a fight with a best friend, you’ll learn what a real apology looks like and how to deliver it with meaning.
You’ll learn that words will cut deep, actions deeper and how they form scars and scabs that ache and groan. But you’ll learn that you aren’t the total sum of your actions and your words.
You’ll learn how to say “I’m sorry,” and how to mean it. How to feel it from the pit of your stomach to the tip of your tears. Only best friends can teach you how to rebound from a fight.
#11 They Teach You There’s Nothing A Shopping Spree Can’t Fix
Your girls will teach you that there’s nothing a little spending can’t fix. Whether it’s on new clothes, a haircut or a complete makeover, your girls know, understand and respect the fact that a little pampering goes a long way.