We’re all wrongly wired in some part of our brain. But, it’s actually pretty entertaining (and interesting) to think of all the little weird things that this part makes us do, albeit, secretly. After all, it’s the insane in us that helps us stay sane in this insane little world!
Here are 18 things you’d be hell-yeah-ing to as a woman. Because secretly, you do these too:
1. Check out other women
Even if we’re heterosexual. Not to sound sexist, but women are beautiful, and always a delight to look at. Plus, it’s not like we check them out in a creepy manner. Guy or girl, if you’re checking someone out, not in a creepy way, it’s okay. After all, no harm in appreciating beauty, right?
2. Stalk people obsessively
Even if you act cool around your crush, you’ve virtually stripped and analyzed them and everything connected with them, on the interwebs, and off it. I know, we women find it creepy when guys do exactly that. But long live hypocrisy, yo!
3. Say you don’t care about the size of your boobs. Then wear padded/push-up bras. Because!
Hee hee 🙂
4. Play with your boobs
5. Play with your…self
Because why should boys have all the fun? Let’s just accept the fact now, not all women would expressively admit, but everyone, I mean literally everyone enjoys pleasuring themselves. And it’s perfectly okay.
6. Say you don’t care about your man, just to act cool
Truth is, you really love him. And a woman in love…oh that dripping sweetness is sometimes too corny, even for you to handle. Hence, the need for ‘playing it cool’.
7. Strip…for yourself, then check yourself out in the mirror. Sometimes, even whistle at the bombshell that you are!
Woman, this is actually a healthy activity! You should love yourself, and if you do, that’s really awesome! 🙂
8. Hunt through your cleavage for chips that ‘accidentally’ slipped into your t-shirt.
And then talk about it while searching for them. Because there’s just something empowering about talking about your boobs, no?
9. Ignore your crush, only with the hope that he’ll notice.
Woman, my darling woman, do what you want, but know when to stop. Chances are, the boy might just end up getting pissed and walk away.
10. Not take a shower.
And take a perfume/body mist shower instead.
11. Wear the same clothes more than twice in a week, out of laziness.
And then just call it your favourite outfit. Because that’s the only way the fashion gods are going to forgive you!
12. Sleep without removing make-up. Wake up the following day, only to touch up. And you’re ready to go!
And that’s how you boast of getting ready in under ten minutes!
13. Even if you don’t say it out loud, in your head, you use the interjection “aww”, everytime you find something sweet, cute or mushy.
You did exactly that on seeing this gif. C’mon now, don’t lie!
One cannot take away the “aww” from a woman. One just cannot. Okay?
14. Pinch skin to tweeze out in-grown hair.
Not because it needs to come out. But because, somehow, it’s fun…bursting-bubble-wrap kind of fun.
15. Ditch the elevator for stairs, because you like that wiggly feeling on your chest.
And people thought you were embracing a healthier lifestyle? Yeah right! 😛
16. You practise everything in front of the mirror.
Your response to your crush asking you out, you giving an amazing toast at your bestie’s wedding, your winning-an-Oscar speech…even though you’re probably a Chartered Accountant, and far from acting in films.
17. Watch cheesy guy-asks-girl out videos, and hope that someday, you’ll be asked out by your Prince Charming the same way.
*pukes* Lol, jk. Ya man, Prince Charming! *starry eyes*
18. Comment on Facebook saying, “this list is so not true!” but secretly agree with each and every point.
You bad, bad girl! x)